Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Ear Lavage

I had an Ear Lavage today. Sounds interesting right? It's pronounced 'la-VAJ', like it's very fancy and French. It sounds like 'la vache' (which I think means 'the cow' if I remember my French from high school. So I guess I came very close to having an Ear The Cow).

Well, if you've never had one, let me tell you, it is not very fancy. It's actually very gross and weird. This was done at the doctor's office. The doctor said I had too much gunk in my ears. So she had a lady come in to give me an Ear The Cow. The lady gave me a plastic tub to hold under my ear. Then she took a squirt bottle with a special attachment and unloaded about a gallon of water into my ear.
It kind of sounded like this:

SQWSSSSSSHHHH-SQWSSSSSSSHHHHH-SQWSSSSSSSHHHHH-SQWSSSSSSSSHHHHHH

except for like a hundred squirts and not just 4. And it feels like someone is jabbing you inside of your head in an area that was never meant to be jabbed. Then when she stops squirting, it sounds like your ear is full of bubbles.

Every once in a while, she took a break to empty the tub of water/ear goo. And if I was lucky she'd say 'Hey! A nice big chunk came out that time!' Then she'd look inside my ear to see if it was clean yet. If it wasn't, she'd go back to trying to shoot water into my brain.

Anyhow, my ears are now free from gunk. Which I guess it's good. I just hope they stay un-gunky so I don't need another Ear The Cow. I really didn't enjoy it.

3 comments:

Tara said...

Oh yea, I remember having that done when I was a kid. It was pretty weird, definitely. :) Ear The Cow. That's hilarious. :) I think I've been pretty obsessed with my ears every since so it must not have been terribly pleasant.

Mrs.Taylor said...

I work in a trauma center and always give a secret giggle when the doctor calls out that he can't see the inner ear because it's blocked by ear wax. I am also a victim of hyperactive ear wax. I hope I never get in a car accident...

BigKat said...

Ok, if I'm in a car wreck and the doctor says something about my ear wax, I'm going to yell out 'Stop laughing at me!' just in case. :)